Right, so.  It was suggested by a few people that I might want to start keeping a written record of my practice and learning when it comes to fencing.   I guess it couldn't hurt...much.

Here is where I am:

I started going to fencing practice late in January of this year (2016).  I started making it a regular thing in March.  I got my SCA authorization at GNEW on July 9, 2016.   I have been attempting to make it to at least one practice a week, work and practice schedule permitting.  My current practices are Wednesday in Bergental and Thursday in Carolingia.

My greatest fencing accomplishment so far is winning 25 fights over the course of two days to join the Handsome Boys.  I might be just a bit over proud of this accomplishment as I refuse to fence without my Handsome Boys belt on. 

I need to work on everything.  I do from get complements on my blade work (parries and the like) from time to time but I know that I need to be stronger and smaller with those.  I need to work on my arm strength, my footwork, and my stamina.  I need to be a better judge of distance and reach.  I always always always need to work on my off hand parries and start to put something in that hand.   I need to work on continuing action until the bout is over or retreat is the correct step.

I also need to work on my fighter brain and my negative self talk in regards to fencing.  I tend to be a painful honest person.  It is hard for me to say "I am going to win this bout" because I know there is only a small chance that I will.  When Llewellyn tells me "Go murder people," I say "I will try."  Of course, he then give me a look and says, "Go murder people."  Confidence - not my strong point.

My current focus is on parries as they are the base of all and having that muscle memory will go a long way to making me a better fighter.  I am also going to work on my fighter brain because that is going to take a lot of work.

I have a few goals.  In the short term (next year), I have three goals: stronger parries and stronger fighter brain (I need a matrix for those...), authorize in two other styles, and become a MIT/Marshal.   In the middle term (two years), I want to get out of my "bucket", as they say, in a big tournament.  My longest of long term goals is to become a wicked good single sword fighter.  I want to devastate people in tournaments with just a sword.  It is a very hard goal, but it is doable. 
 
I acknowledge that I am a rank beginner.   I also acknowledge that everyone has more experience and more skill than I do.  I acknowledge that what I am learning is hard and complex and takes time and effort.  Failure is part of learning  Failure is learning.  Failure is part of the process.  As long as you keep failing better every time.

This seems weird, writing it all down.  But maybe it will help.